Marriage

I've been married for ten years. Some will say that's nothing and others will say it's a long time. I've learned a lot in our marriage. Jimmy is many things to me outside of my husband. He's my best friend, dish washer, yard man, lover, bug killer, and my gossip buddy.

The relationship between two people in a committed relationship is sacred. Your partner should be your best friend, the one you would trust with your life, your secrets, other people's secret (;-) ), and your joys.

In our relationship, I know Jimmy is the only one I can go home to, tell him everything that went on in my day and all the things I've heard during my day, and I know it won't be shared. The same goes with Jimmy. 

A marriage is the one place where you can share in safety-  your deepest darkest secrets, the gossip that you can't share with anyone else, but need to share with someone you trust.

Here is my token opinion about GOSSIP. Not to be right or wrong, just what I believe.

Grown people will make their own decisions. Right or Wrong, it is there's to make regardless if we, the people who are looking in, agree or disagree with their decision. We are not to judge anyone. When you meddle in to the lives of others because you believe it is right or wrong, or because you believe it's "juicy gossip" you are stepping into a realm you do not comprehend. You are stepping into the realm of lives you can change forever - for good or for bad. If you are meddling it's mostly bad and the repercussions of your actions will hurt many people because you could not keep your mouth shut. 

My rule of thumb, trust your relationship to note that what you hear is for you and your partner only. Or else you'll find yourself in a marriage that is slowly chipping away at forever.

the best thing

post from 2.8.11

It's 4:30am and I laid next to my son watching his eyes get heavy with each blink, his breathing slow to a calm easy pace, the pucker around the nipple of his bottle slow to a stop, until he fell asleep. And when the bottle dropped to his side, and the lids of eyes didn't open, my heart smiled and I knew I was watching the best thing in the world, my beautiful little boy asleep.

Lately, this has been a ritual with him. He hasn't been able to sleep at night and one of us, Jimmy or me, stays up with him until he can. I know he's needed us to fall asleep but mostly his eczema keeps him up. Today though, he was up because he wasn't tired. No itching. No crying out in pain. No frustration. Just pure happy energy. And I, having took a short nap, didn't mind it at all. Any night that isn't full of painful itching is a good night for him.

Some parents may read this and think that I'm absolutely absurd to allow our children not to have a set schedule of bedtime. We never did and probably never will. Right now, they are able to get a full nights rest no matter what time of day they sleep. They are loved, nurtured, kept well and safe, and are extremely brilliant children without a schedule and it works for us.

I'm thankful for the nights that I know Phantom is well. And even though I'm up at 4:30am writing this blog, I'm happy knowing my boy fell asleep because he wore himself out playing instead of itching. One day, the nights like these will be more frequent and sleep will come easier for us all. Tonight, I'll just cherish the thought that I know he was happy just before he fell asleep and his mind is in a good place dreaming good things. Now it's my turn. Good night.